In our modern world, the act of being submissive is almost always considered weak, unintelligent and unwise.  In his book "Drawing Heaven Into Your Marriage, Powerful Principles with Eternal Results", H. Walace Goddard explains that the opposite is true.  Goddard describes a "higher kind of submission."  He says:

 

"In godly submission, as in all things, Jesus is preeminent.  He did not allow Himself to be mocked and crucified because He was weak and frightened.  It was a triumph of His goodness that He did not use His immense power to destroy those who persecuted Him.  He chose to let his goodness govern His power.  The Person with the greatest power chose to be the most submissive."

  

 

In marriage, where there is a great deal of compromise required, how often do we become hurt or defensive?  When we experience these emotions it is easy to react with a desire to dominate the other person and make them feel smaller or less than ourselves.  This can cause us to hurt those that we love most.  Although a difficult task, if we will allow ourselves to follow the example of the savior of the world who, being perfect, submitted himself to death at the hands of those who were far less powerful than He, our hearts can be changed and we can build marriages that last through eternity.  

 

This can be such an incredibly difficult thing to do when everything around us tells us to fight!  To push and crawl our way to the top.  Goddard points out that it takes "strength of character" to resist the urge to needlessly "fix" all that we feel is wrong with our spouse.  The Lord's way opens the door for us to become humble, to see ourselves and others as He sees us and in turn, our need to be the best is diminished and our desire for peace is increased.  What are some things you can do to develop strength of character?

Elder Neal A. Maxwell has said

"The submission of one’s will is really the only uniquely personal thing we have to place on God’s altar. It is a hard doctrine, but it is true. The many other things we give to God, however nice that may be of us, are actually things He has already given us, and He has loaned them to us. But when we begin to submit ourselves by letting our wills be swallowed up in God’s will, then we are really giving something to Him. And that hard doctrine lies at the center of discipleship. There is a part of us that is ultimately sovereign, the mind and heart, where we really do decide which way to go and what to do. And when we submit to His will, then we’ve really given Him the one final thing He asks of us. And the other things are not very, very important. It is the only possession we have that we can give, and there is no lessening of our agency as a result. Instead, what we see is a flowering of our talents and more and more surges of joy. Submission to Him is the only form of submission that is completely safe."  (Insights from my life, Ensign, August 2000)